Category: satire

Traditional Marketing Techniques That Work Well on Social Media

The digital age of marketing descended on many advertising agencies and marketing teams like a ton of lobster bisque; creamy, but ultimately fatal. They scrambled to jettison the old tried-and-true marketing methods in favor of newer, flashy, paradigms and parameters. In the process digital marketers forgot how well the ancient basics of marketing had served […]

New Wrinkles in AI Marketing to Children

The triumph of Google’s Alexa has proven to be no flash in the pan. As more and more homes come to depend on the artificial intelligence of this new technology star, marketers are naturally growing more and more interested in learning how to exploit all AI apps in the home to advertise their wares.   […]

Digital Marketing for Dummkopfs

Digital marketing, like the Ebola virus, is here to stay. It’s been around long enough now that there are some basic rules that marketers should know by heart and be able to recite when marching around the boardroom of clients. For digital marketers who may have been in a coma for the past ten years, […]

The Most Effective Digital Marketing Strategies

Digital marketing is more data-driven today than ever before. In fact, everything is more data driven today than ever before — except for the manufacturing of paper clips; those people don’t want to learn ANYTHING.   This brash new world of data-driven marketing has some essential ground rules that need to be followed in order […]

How to Market Your Brand Successfully

Shakespeare wrote long ago: “A rose by any other name is still a pain to sit on.” Or words to that effect. And it’s the same today. No matter what kind of rose you are trying to sell the public, they will insist on sitting on it, hard, and complaining about the thorns, rather than […]

Blockchain to Revolutionize Digital Marketing

Marketers love blockchain; and blockchain loves marketers. This torrid romance is caused by blockchain’s new technology, which allows the retrieval and interpretation of data faster and better than ever before.   Building trust between marketers and consumers has always been a dicey proposition. Marketers are assigned items that they must get consumers to buy, no […]

How Marketing and Sales Are Like Identical Twins

The close relationship between marketing and sales is as old as history itself. When the first caveman decided he wanted all those sharp and heavy rocks out of his cave, he went next door and convinced his neighbor that the rocks in his cave were a good investment. His neighbor, the dumb brute, immediately traded […]